Fringe Sweater – c/o Sheinside  //  Tights – UO  //  Boots – Dr. Martens  //  Sunglasses – c/o Epokhe

So it’s 2 AM as I am writing this post.  Do you ever feel like you are running a million miles an hour and can’t catch a breath?  That’s about me right now.  It’s good things…promising opportunities, new exciting projects, website re-designs (ahem, mine!)….but boy is it taking a toll on my shut eye.  I want nothing more than to press pause, but I won’t let myself.  I can’t stand to see opportunities slip by.  So here I am.  2 AM and finally getting to my blog.  Husband sawing logs in bed and baby sleeping for what has been 6 hours now.  Let me tell you.  The girl is averaging 13-14 hours a night.  If I could insert an emoticon it’d be that one with the two hands lifted to heaven (hallelujah, praise the Lord, dream baby, my hero).

Truth be told, I have been having the baby-sitter debate often as of late.  Should I….or shouldn’t I?  For now, I haven’t committed to the idea, but it’s been on my mind….a lot.  I have the best mom in the world who lives 20 minutes away and will watch Rylee at the drop of a hat….but I can’t expect her to live her life around my schedule.  As wonderful as that sounds.  Sometimes I just feel like I need ONE MORE DAY.  One more day in the week devoted solely to “catching up”.  To answer all my emails, to tie up loose ends, to clean the house!  Common ideal world, where are you hiding?  Anyway, I’ll keep you posted as I wrestle with the idea of a sitter and chime in if you have any thoughts or experience or “there, there’s”.

All this busy talk is reminding me of this post Anna of In Honor of Design wrote a bit ago about how she has committed to going to bed at the same time as her husband, every night.  For some reason, it keeps popping in my head and convicting me of my own unhealthy sleep habits.  I can’t remember the last time Sam and I went to bed at the same time.  Shamefully, it was probably pre-baby.  I am realizing I am opening myself up to some judgement here….but it’s the honest truth.  We still love each other, we just don’t fall asleep at the same time.  But I wish that wasn’t the case.  My “work time” is the 5 hours after Rylee goes to sleep for the night.  It’s when I feel most creative, and really, the only time I have to focus, distraction free.  Sam wakes up at an ungodly hour so he’s always in bed by 9:30…..so you can see the dilemma here.  But it can’t be this way forever, can it?  Well, it shouldn’t.  I do think having a sitter for a few hours a couple days a week would help in this regard, but I’m also challenged to just “let it go” sometimes.  To leave my to-do list for the next day (however scary that might be) and snuggle in with my hubby more often.  I also loved Jodi’s post on the topic of time efficiency as well.  I guess a lot of us are dealing with the same struggles!

Photos by Erica



  1. Sioned

    You look beautiful in these as always. Britain needs to stop snowing!

    Molly has a childminder three days a week, one day I work and the other two I study, in May I will be working on those three days. It’s tough on me, I miss her, wonder if she would prefer to be at home, prefer to be with me. I would prefer to be at home! But when I see her get excited when she sees her childminders front door, I know she’s happy and developing and making friends with the other children Vikki looks after. Its all to do with the childminder you find, I decided a nursery was too much for such a little one, I don’t think they get the same attention, though they do get the benefit of mixing with lots of children opposed to two others. I trust Vikki completely, you have to to let them look after your most precious part of you. And I knew the moment I met her she was the one. I’d recommend having Rylee at the childminders home rather than a sitter at yours because if she pines for you from the other room you’ll get even less work done! Molly cried the first few times I dropped her off but Vikky would soon distract her with the animals and toys and I’d get a text almost immediately to let me know she was playing well.

    My mother in law was a childminder so I have a long list of questions I asked each candidate, I can email you them if you do decide to chose to go that route :)

    I recommend it, it makes the time I have with her 100% focused on her rather than trying to get everything done throughout the day and neither getting my full attention.

    Jamie and I aim to go to bed at the same time on weekends because if the same problem! Ahh maybe we’ll have that luxury again sometime.. In a few years ha!


  2. Kathleen

    As you know, I’m not a mama yet. BUT I vote you not only hire a babysitter but also take up your mom on more grandma/Rylie time AND hire a house cleaner. It takes a village!


    • kelli

      ha! You know it Kathleen. And I think I need to hire YOU for brand advice. I’ve been running in circles over here! I guess I need a lot of help ;)

  3. ieva

    do not feel bad that you want to have a child-minder. if you get your things done (not necessarily them all)-you will be happier. that means everybody around you will be happier. especially little one. i know the situation. again.:)

  4. Tasha

    You look amazing as always Kelli!

    I know that disconnected feeling you are having with the varying timetables. It seems though that you have some flexibility with your schedule. Would you lose a lot of time if you tried going to bed at the same time as Sam, then getting up early and working in the morning? Or even if that works. I have a creative peak late at night which means I’d probably be like you and prefer to work at night (sadly not working at the mo due to the limitations of renting this particular apartment… long story).

    Rylee is lucky to have you home so much, and to have her grandma not far away. If getting a sitter one day a week, means you can get some good sleep at night and feel on top of things, there really seems like no harm. You will also feel more refreshed and have more energy to devote to Rylee. I can’t wait to move closer to my family so that I can have some more help. I feel like I cruise on autopilot all too often xxx

  5. Giovanna

    Sounds like you’re wrestling with the same issues as many other moms. I’m not a mom yet but I think it’s important for you to pursue your interests. One day Rylee will be grown up and when that happens you don’t want to ask yourself ‘now what?’. Grams/sitter sound like good options and before long Rylee will be in pre-school which will free up your day. I hope you can work on your sleep habits, though. I just read something in Women’s Health about why sleep is so important..of course I forgot all the details but it convinced me that a regular sleep schedule is essential. Whatever you decide, it sounds like you’re doing a great job.

  6. Kastles

    First of all love these photos! Your style photos are always such unique shots & inspiring, I feel stuck in a runt. Also those boots are awesome!
    I can’t offer much advice in the babysitter area since we don’t have any wee ones yet. What about any brothers or sisters? The hubby & I like to play babysitter to our niece & nephew nearby. I understand your struggle with going to bed late. I am a night hawk & always have been. I am just more productive at night. I usually go to the bed with the hubby but ending up surfing pinterest & instagram in bed while he is sleeping to think of projects & ideas. I am sure you will figure it all out pretty lady! Look forward to seeing the redesign, I am in desperate need of one! haha!
    <3 Kastles

  7. Sarah

    Although I don’t have kids yet I think about this subject often! I want a baby sometime soon but time management with working from home, taking care of a baby, getting sleep, and cooking and cleaning seems almost impossible! I know many children that have benefited from spending time with a sitter and developed friendships with and through that sitter. A couple days a week I imagine would help you tremendously and be a fun change-up for Rylee! Moms have the responsibility to teach their children to someday be independent and if they can learn to be content with someone else for a few hours I’ve noticed that always helps in that area! You’re such a beautiful, loving
    Mom. I know when Rylee is grown she will appreciate your example of a woman that didn’t give up on your dreams and creating even though things got extremely busy! Your work will benefit her and it will be an example to her to find her passion and go for it!

    • kelli

      Gosh, thank you Sarah! Those words are so encouraging to me! Just what I needed to hear this morning. Thanks girl.

  8. Anna @ IHOD

    Oh the life of the creative, right? It is SO hard for me to keep that rule with the hubs, and it has to be broken sometimes, but guess what makes it easier for me? I have a babysitter! She comes just once or twice a week but its those few hours to run to the store, catch up on emails, work through a project, etc. I hear you. Our lives wearing many hats can catch up with us sometimes and be suffocating. When I finally accepted the fact I couldn’t do it all, it was relieving. I know you will find good solutions for you and your family because its obvious you love them! Hugs friend~

    • kelli

      Well, your post gave me a swift kick in the butt Anna….(in the best way). I admire the way you balance it all! It’s a tough one…but something I hope to get better at! You inspire me.

  9. Kacia

    I, too, loved that post from Anna. And Kelli, I think you’ve been eavesdropping our conversations here too….so hard to commit to it – and we’re failing miserably– but we’re trying. I do think it’s important – and i don’t want to keep saying “we will when…. we will when…”


  10. Bri Kim

    I have recently noticed that same bedtime issue with my husband and I. I am a hairstylist so my hours vary and I am just terrible at getting to bed early. The hubs works a bit more normal job and is usually in bed much earlier than I. I noticed lately that we might be a little disconnected because of it but I am just not tired when he is! Maybe ill just “put him to bed” so to speak and then sneak out for some bad tv? Haha

  11. Sabina

    Hey there. I found your blog through the Modcloth interview and just wanted to say I love your art and your taste.

    And I hear you re: time management. I’m not even a mom and I feel it too. There always seems to be obstacles to having the productive days I plan on. And I also illustrate so I know how time consuming that can be even without interruptions.

    Well I look forward to reading more. Now following you through Bloglovin’.

  12. Kim

    I hope you get some rest and get some of things you want to get accomplished completed as well. I often find that I do not cross of all things I had planned for the day, but I’m trying to make my goals more realistic and less all encompassing as I tend to do ;)

  13. jenn

    my son is 18 and away for 5 days visiting colleges alone for the first time in years, get the child minder keep your independence! That is what will help you, your dh and your baby! We all need our independence. It will help your daughter in the long run and you!



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